Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Impending Doom

There's a bunch of stuff going on in the world, so I hear. I saw something about Hugo Chavez granting himself power of decree, which annoyed me at first, and then I remembered the only people he's a threat to is Venezuelans. My focus has been largely inside the lifelines over the past few weeks and will continue to be until the end of the month.

It's funny that I listen to the news every day and nothing quite spins me up the way it used to, when I'm more concerned about keeping this ship afloat for the next five or six years. Lately, it may as well be a fact that the world will cease to exist after March 2nd, since that's really as far out as I'm planning anything at the moment, due to our upcoming visit from the Board of Inspection and Survey.

I've posted about it before, but it's the most painful inspection that any ship goes through. It happens every five years and the really bad ones can get Chief Engineers and Commanding Officers fired.

Anyway, I know that we are going to be ready and it won't be pleasant, but we'll make it through. Deep down, however, there's that creeping fear of failure. That's been why this blog's been deader than I'd like since I got back off deployment in December. What little time I don't spend on the ship, I spend at home getting as much time as possible with my family before I deploy again - in April.

The operational tempo has been unusually high lately, due to world events and what have you, in all the services. It's been nowhere near as high for me as it has been for others, but as far as the Navy goes, this is pretty high. It's rough on families - to give you an example, I was underway for Red's birthday, I will be underway for my anniversary, and for my and Jack's birthday's. That's all after returning from our last deployment.

What have you been up to?

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Sunday, January 14, 2007

I Am Awesome

I have to write my fitness report. It's got to be done last Friday, so I'm finishing it today. I can't ever think of anything to write about myself, so when I draft it, I start out with

LT Armstrong is awesome
Here's how awesome he is:
That's why LT Armstrong is awesome

So it's stupid, but starts me thinking. This one's tough, though. It only covers 30 days. I was on leave for a week and a half, nothing happened for a week (because everyone else was on leave), and then we were underway for a week to train with our new helicopter detachment (HSL 44 Det 10) and get preparations done for INSURV.

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I Just Want To Be Friends... With Benefits!

As always, I delude myself into thinking that the Internet is wondering why I haven't called or written. Espousing opinions on varied and sundry topics ends up taking a back seat when I'm swamped and don't have time for slow, annoying Internet to down/upload things as applicable while on the ship.

I mean, honestly, with INSURV in five weeks, the only thing that is really vexing is INSURV. I guarantee that I'll have more time for you March, Internet.

Off the ship, I've discovered that since coming home, I remain a stranger in my own house. Red is so used to handling everything that she's doesn't want me to help, lest I screw up her system, which consists wholly of piles of paper which she stacks on every horizontal surface that I'm told I own. She and I had a good discussion about this last night, and I really need to spend some time on home improvement projects.

No, Internet, I don't blame you that my front lawn is dead, or that my sunroom needs a floor AND leaks AND has mold, or that half of my stuff is still in my garage and I haven't fully moved into my house yet (in seven months).

My son, though he barely knows me, will not let me go and reaches out for me to pick him up at every opportunity, even when being held by others (like Red). Tyring to integrate back into family was even harder over the holidays, flying to Minnesota and getting Jack out of his routine and not really spending any quality time with Red. And now we're back, she still doesn't want to get a babysitter so we can go on a date once in a while.

So the last thing I need is the Internet eating up my time. I'm up for the occasional quickie if I can get 128K, even 64K, on the ship. At home, our time together will be sparse.

I'm not breaking up with you, Internet (especially since my mother and grandmother read People Covered in Fish); I just want to see other people. I just got Red to let me clean the office during my holiday tomorrow. Even though I'd love to blog and browse and email, I need to work on my family. You understand, right? Oh, I'll still visit and write once in a while, but I just can't give you the attention you really deserve.

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